The Stars In Your Eyes (COMING SOON)

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The Stars In Your Eyes (COMING SOON)

Check out my new, in-progress Wattpad Story!

Description:

“You can’t save me.Why do you keep trying?” he whispered. I rested my head against his chest. “Because you’re saving me.” Sophia is starting college in a new state, away from her grief-ridden past. She wants a fresh start, with her cat Poe by her side, and to find her place. The last thing she expected was for a boy with blue eyes and scars deeper than she could imagine to throw her plans out the window

 

***Hope you guys check it out! :)

Anti-Islamic Sentiment & An Alarming Stupidity Rate

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I am so done. I am so DONE with the assholery in people these days.

I blame media. I could go on and on, but for now, for anyone who’s not Muslim who happens to be reading this, let me clarify a few things:

1) Do not believe the people who quote random verses of the Quran and cite it as reasons why Islam is militant and evil and bla bla bla. These people cherry-pick verses, translate them on Google, without ever bothering to figure out the context. I could say, “I shot fifteen of them,” and that alone sounds incriminating. But what I said was, “We were playing laser tag, and I won. I shot fifteen of them. Everyone had to buy me pizza.” COMPLETELY DIFFERENT MEANING, RIGHT? But no, these people pick some verse from Surah that they probably couldn’t even pronounce, Google translate, and voila! They look like they have legitimate evidence to back their claims. Don’t try to argue with these people. Your desk has a higher level of comprehension.

2) If, say, there are 16,000 ‘Islamist’ terrorists in the world, that still wouldn’t make 0.001 percent of the Muslim population in the world. What about the rest of us Muslims? Why are we stigmatized because a few crack pots kidnap kids and justify it because they had some imaginary divine calling? I don’t know what religion those psychos prescribe to, but it’s not Islam. My point is, there are so, so many more Muslims in the world that shop in grocery stores, worry about their homework, if their favorite team will win the championships, if these jeans make them look fat.

3) If you don’t believe in Islam, that’s fine. You are entitled to your faith and your beliefs. But aren’t we entitled to ours?

4) For the people who keep throwing the argument that Muslim women in third world countries are stoned, or lashed, or forced into marriage as soon as they hit puberty: stop. Just…stop. I lived in a ‘third-world country’ for two years. It didn’t work out because of personal reasons, and we came back to America. I’m as American as they come. And let me tell you, I saw no women being stoned, not rivers of blood as the gestapo whipped a sobbing woman. Nope. A little nugget of info: if the cherry-pickers would bother actually understanding the Quran, they’d know it was meant to change with the times. It’s principles and doctrines stay the same, of course. But things like punishment and civil law change. This has happened all over the world. Capital punishment in Europe was outlawed. I don’t think anyone uses Chinese water torture anymore. Most American states have outlawed the death penalty. So if that could change, is it such a stretch that the Qurans punishment clauses are based on era?

5) I’m not going to act like a ten year old and say, “But they did it too!”. Let me just say: Crusades. Salem Witch Trials. Pogroms. Holocaust. Ya know, just to name a few.

6) There are extremists in every religion in the world. There are always going to be wackos who are chemically imbalanced and think a good way to get their point across is to kidnap hundreds of little girls and threaten to sell them into slavery.

7) Almost all terrorists cite political reasons for why they do what they do. They’re unhappy with their government, so they use religion as an umbrella to cause anarchy. Just look at what’s happening now- the terrorist group is unhappy with Western schooling. I won’t even pretend to understand that logic, but it’s not religious. Nowhere in any religious text in the world does it say, “and thou shalt not be taught mitochondria”

 

So…to end this long post, I’m going to post the link to the amazing man inspired me. He’s British, and I can only hope I have his skills someday. Here it is: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151968433566143&set=vb.128661986142&type=2&theater

Hopefully it works. I’m wondering, now that they scandalous secret of my religion has been revealed, how many people are going to prove my point and unfollow me. I hope not. I really hope people are better than pettiness like that.

I should really start my math homework.

Here Lies Dedication-Do Not Rest In Peace

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I usually try to abstain from posting too many personal things about myself, not because I’m worried there are any Jeffrey Dahmer’s or Ted Bundy’s lurking on WordPress, but because I’m worried that any advice or input from others could influence me enough to make a radical decision, one that isn’t right. But I’m being paraniod, per usual. 

To cut to the point, to the heart of the matter-my dedication has died an untimely death. Let me illustrate how dedication in every aspect of my life has basically vanished, leaving me feeling adrift and meaningless. 

  1. ACADEMICS 

I’m an AP/ Honors student, so yes, I’ve got a slightly above average intelligence. Whoop-dee-doo. I used to love the act of learning, and the straight A’s were an added benefit. I used to read anatomy books for fun. I still hated math, but come on. That subject is Satan. I still got an A in it though, ironically. I guess i got so used to everything coming easily to me that when the time came to step it up-and by a lot, I was ill-prepared. Sure, I’m still thrilled when I do well on a test or get the grade I want in a class, but it’s overshadowed by the fear that I won’t be able to keep it, or worse, I won’t even try. Any and all motivation to excel academically is pretty much again. I know part of it comes from the fact that a lot of my friends are good students, but average. One is busy with sports, one’s busy with art and religion, one’s busy with singing…the point is they have other passions and things to pursue. I have my writing, my stories, but even though’s I’ve lost passion for. Now they just live in my head, only occasionally do the words appear. I know the things I want, a great university, I career that I love that’ll leave me financially prosperous, to travel the world. Each of them wants something different. And lately, I’ve been letting their dreams disrupt the pursuit of my own. 

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Pretty sure ‘acception’ isn’t a word, but whatever

 

       2. RELIGION

Ever since the time my dedication decided to begin a slow and steady decline, my faith has been impacted. The solace I used to take, my strong belief that through the darkness there will always be light I could turn to…it’s been dimmed. My connection with God has been severed by my own hand. It’s foremost on my list of things to fix. Unfortunately, there’s a huge obstacle that I can’t seem to overcome:me and my stupid decisions. 

       3. PERSONAL LIFESTYLE

AKA my weight. For my birthday, I was given a 2 year membership to 24 Hour Fitness- no, it’s not offensive, it’s something I wanted. But I can’t seem to utilize it. And of course, lack of dedication is a problem. My weight nags at me every single day, especially because I’m going on a trip where people haven’t seen me in years. I don’t want to see the surprise on their faces from how much my body has changed. BUT…it’s not only a lack of dedication that’s hindering me here. The gym terrifies me. There are creepy old guys that outright stare at you, even though I’m usually wearing sweats and a shirt, people with the perfect bodies, and trainers hovering over your shoulder every ten seconds. There’s so much judging at the gym, it’s almost like a high school locker room. I want to go, but the anxiety is definitely fueling the little devil on my shoulder.

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      4. Me

Originality. That’s what distinguished gold from silver, a ram from sheep. Everything that makes me me is seeping from between my fingers. My head is filled with music, slang, hashtags, shows…meaningless things. I don’t spend time with my family, or bother cleaning, or trying to learn something new. My passion has been replaced by an all-around numbness. I don’t read any interesting or out there books any more. My determination, my will, was my core. It was the spine that kept me standing. And now without it? I’m all over the place, and I don’t know how I’m going to get myself together. And the amount of shows that I watch! It’s ridiculous! I’ll spend hours watching episode after episode until my head is numb and my eyes sting

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Conclusions:

I’m an all or nothing kind of girl. If I have dedication for even one of the things I listed, I’d have it for all of them. And I know lots of people just say that we should try harder. That’s good and everything, but why would try when you can’t remember what you’re fighting for? Or why? It’s like a hazy memory, and you can’t imagine giving up the ignorance you live in now. 

But I’m going to try, I really am. I’m master of my own future. I’m going to get myself back. It might take a while, and it will be hard. But, in the spirit of Jordan Sparks….

Take it one step at a time. 

Quick Rage Reliever

I plan on posting a very long entry on this subject.  The subject of how hatred, fear, and discrimination has shaped America into something ugly. Today I happened to go on Yahoo news and was absolutely disgusted and horrified to find what some people had commented on about a post talking about the Nypd spying on Muslims. The things that people said have put me in a bad mood all day. Things like “Muslims should be shot on the spot” and how they “deserved it” and they should all just go back to theit country. Call me sheltered, but I had no idea it had gotten this bad in terms of the Muslim communities relations with America. Whether or not you agree with the faith, its downright inhumane and terrible to degrade them as people because of what they believe. Thats practically regressing this country to its worst eras. Its just horrible, and I can’t stand it. More later.

Mean Girls-Inspiring Song

I ran across this song by accident, and I think it’s amazing. This happens to so many girls, and people make fun of them if they’re cutters, suicidal, ‘goth’, downers. Nobody ever really questions why, or wonders if they might have a part in it. Please listen and spread this song, it’s very touching and might help someone.

High School Smackdown: The Nerd vs. The Stoner

THE STONERS:

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THE PARTY-HARDY

 

 

 

 

 THE NERDS:

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Two vastly different subspecies in every high school. I wouldn’t say my school has ‘cliques’ per se…more like loosely organized groups. I want to address the nerds and the stoners today (although knowing me, I might go off on a tangent). This is not a stereotype. I’m perfectly aware not all nerds or all stoners fall in these categories. 

The Nerds:

We are the ones who second guess all our decisions, try to hold ourselves to ideological principles, romanticize relationships. and believe the world is sunny and rosy. Life for us is relatively difficult, since grades are our Mekkah and AP testings Dante’s Inferno. We obey our parents, and we have good, clean fun. 

At least, on the outside. 

It would astonish most of the world to discover that the biggest assholes are usually nerds, and the biggest vluts (virgin sluts) are usually studious girls. The guys are intellectual snobs, and the girls are practically vampires: Disney princesses during the day, and restless succubi at night. 

We try to fit our lives around studying, and what most people don’t realize is that because we’re so constrained, breaking us loose is like releasing the Kraken. We live on control, keeping every little thing under our hands. 

Whatever you do, don’t screw with a nerd when it comes to their grades. Blood will be shed. Copiously. 

 

 

The Stoner: 

This interesting species is fascinating to observe. They’re carefree, passionate, and the true embodiment of a teenager. I don’t necessarily mean ‘Stoner’ as in those that take drugs, although a lot of this sect do. This is just anyone who’s slotted as an ‘underachiever’ and is more adept and partying than multiplying. For instance, this guy I know Berto, is suave and always the one leading the charge to break rules. Leaves campus to drive with a friend (both of which aren’t allowed) to go get donuts. Doesn’t do his homework, undoubtedly has dabbled in drugs, and doesn’t seem to have a shy bone in his body. I admire all of these qualities, because personally, I’m shy, introverted, awkward, and prone to blushing when speaking to attractive males. What would it be like, to fear nothing? To live life to it’s fullest? To look back and have regrets and accomplishments besides whether or not I failed a quiz? 

On one hand, the Stoners don’t have a plan, and they commit themselves to a limited future with their laziness. On the other hand, most of them learn to rely on themselves in life. Us nerds are comfortable, usually middle class, and the most we do without parental guidance are our volunteering activities. Another guy I know, Kale, is planning on attending trade school, has a girlfriend (ADORABLE couple, so hippie-like), doesn’t do jack at school, and is outspoken and admired. 

You tell me, who does it seem will succeed in the real world? Nerds may clutch their stellar academic reputation like a life jacket to keep from drowning, but stoners are practically doing the butterfly and backstroke. 

 

For their future career, I think the prize goes to:

And the winners at living life:

Who do you think is the real winner?