Truer words were never spoken. Today I deactivated my facebook account, because frankly that thing was just wasting my time. I’ve been feeling sluggish, lazy, and just upset at the world. I want school to end, but I don’t think things are going to get better. I have a theory on what it is that makes people hate themselves: Things they know are wrong, but they can’t seem to stop doing it. Self-degradation. The one person that we should always aspire to be happy for is ourselves. So, for example, if a person who is in Weight Watchers is home alone, and they think, “Eating that piece of cheesecake really won’t do anything, I’m already losing lots of weight. This won’t really matter.” So they just go ahead and eat that acursed divine piece of cheesecake. Immediately after that last bite is swallowed, the guilt starts to attack. Why did I do this? I was making so much progress! If a stupid slice of cake can make me break my vow, how will I ever lose weight? You keep doing it, and you descend into self-hatred, the most serious of all mental diseases in my opinion. I wish I could give advice on how to stop it. Not only for food, but for anyone who has ever had a temptation or addiction they struggle against. Theoretically, I know the steps that should be taken. I think everyone does. But it’s putting it in action that’s the bitch, and until I have some success on my part, I can’t be a hypocrite and tell you what to do. But just because I’m putting an X for today’s success, doesn’t mean I’m giving up.
That would truly be the biggest failure of all.