For teenagers especially, coming into our bodies is one of the most challenging aspects of our lives. How many times have you stared at another person and compared yourself to them academically, aesthetically, etc? For most, tons of times. You can be in a conversation with a friend and you’re gaze strays to a girls body and you sigh and chastise yourself for eating so much. You see a someone get a better score than you and you wonder why they did so much better than you when they studied as much. This mindset leads people to self- degradation and loss of pride. They start acting out in ways that they normally wouldn’t, trying to prove themselves through a vice that’s only harmful to them. Some spiral into an all-consuming depression where they can’t see a way out. Days become long and dreary, it loses it’s color and flavor. You wait until the time that some miraculous change happens and you become the person you dream about in your head. That confident person who has the willpower to reach for their dreams, the one who can easily stride up to a person they’re attracted to and talk without feeling self-conscious, or like they’re bothering them. Well, I’ve discovered something. I may be young, I may be wrong, and I may offend someone, but hey, this is a diverse world. If we didn’t have differing opinions, there’d be nothing to say. These are the steps I’ve decided to take to overcome my two bad habits to become the person I dream of being, bodily, intellectually, and spiritually.
- Find a mantra (mine is Beautiful, Successful, Faithful )
- Join an organization, club, volunteer program to expose you to new things and adventures that can mold your mind and confidence. (I’m doing kickboxing and volunteering at a children’s educational facility)
- Tell someone. Believe it or not, this is a great move because that person will almost certainly share one of their fears, and you two can keep each other motivated, strong, and (this is usually the case with me) now that you’ve told them you won’t want to go back on your word to save face.
- Write down a list of the cons of your habit and keep it on hand to look at daily. For example, if it’s crippling shyness, you can write about the opportunities you can lose, the fantastic people you might never get to know, etc.
- Get up, look in the mirror, and chant your mantra. If your a girl, let me tell you this: you are beautiful. You are an amazing person who was put on this earth to fulfill a purpose, and honey, following other people’s designer footsteps is not it. Guys, you have the ability to make or break a girls heart, brighten someone’s day, or just prove that amazing people do indeed exist in this world. Don’t waste it. We are all making our own destiny, and we try to make ourselves more capable of meeting it.
- Purge yourself of your addiction, vice, habit. Take it and throw it away, or just shut it down. If that person from #3 is a family member, tell them to shut it down for you in case you don’t think you can do it.
- You must have the desire to do this. You can want to achieve your goal in theory, but in practice you turn as unresponsive as Raj (from the Big Bang Theory) does around women. YOU’VE GOTTA WANT THIS! You must be able to get up, shake off the little devil in your whispering sweet nothings in your ear, that if listened to will only make you feel worthless and horrible. It’s not unusual to cheat a few times, but you can never justify it, but merely try to correct it.
This time and day, it’s becoming a regularity that teens be portrayed as drunkards with no future, no purpose, and no ambition. People ogle the foreigners who enter the school system to excel. Adults are depicted as tired old hags just waiting for retirement or death. And do not even get me started on the technological, perverse upbringing children are having nowadays. Frankly speaking, our will to fight and try is dwindling faster than a free candy basket at See’s. So don’t be ashamed of who you are, how you look, what you perceive as a fault within yourself. Because thousands of people know how much they need to change, and they simply do not care. That in itself is the fault. As for my fellow teens, lemme tell you something. Don’t let music, TV, popular sentiments, and the casual way our classmates can accept something we know is a major offense sway you from your sense of right or wrong. There’s a spectrum with lot’s of grey area, sure, but inherently we all have a beeper that warns us when we’re doing or seeing something wrong. Listen to it. This is going to sound very corny and sappy, but be in tune with your body and mind. Don’t binge on food, you feel like shit afterwards. Don’t watch naughty footage, the guilt will warp and twist your life. Don’t be shy and keep yourself in a shell, you feel sad and lonely later. There’s a lot more I could use, but I think the message is across. Everyone has a journey to complete, and everyone has their own struggles to deal with. Hope, willpower, mindset, and the power of our hearts and minds will be our hero in tights in the end.