High School Smackdown: The Nerd vs. The Stoner

THE STONERS:

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THE PARTY-HARDY

 

 

 

 

 THE NERDS:

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Two vastly different subspecies in every high school. I wouldn’t say my school has ‘cliques’ per se…more like loosely organized groups. I want to address the nerds and the stoners today (although knowing me, I might go off on a tangent). This is not a stereotype. I’m perfectly aware not all nerds or all stoners fall in these categories. 

The Nerds:

We are the ones who second guess all our decisions, try to hold ourselves to ideological principles, romanticize relationships. and believe the world is sunny and rosy. Life for us is relatively difficult, since grades are our Mekkah and AP testings Dante’s Inferno. We obey our parents, and we have good, clean fun. 

At least, on the outside. 

It would astonish most of the world to discover that the biggest assholes are usually nerds, and the biggest vluts (virgin sluts) are usually studious girls. The guys are intellectual snobs, and the girls are practically vampires: Disney princesses during the day, and restless succubi at night. 

We try to fit our lives around studying, and what most people don’t realize is that because we’re so constrained, breaking us loose is like releasing the Kraken. We live on control, keeping every little thing under our hands. 

Whatever you do, don’t screw with a nerd when it comes to their grades. Blood will be shed. Copiously. 

 

 

The Stoner: 

This interesting species is fascinating to observe. They’re carefree, passionate, and the true embodiment of a teenager. I don’t necessarily mean ‘Stoner’ as in those that take drugs, although a lot of this sect do. This is just anyone who’s slotted as an ‘underachiever’ and is more adept and partying than multiplying. For instance, this guy I know Berto, is suave and always the one leading the charge to break rules. Leaves campus to drive with a friend (both of which aren’t allowed) to go get donuts. Doesn’t do his homework, undoubtedly has dabbled in drugs, and doesn’t seem to have a shy bone in his body. I admire all of these qualities, because personally, I’m shy, introverted, awkward, and prone to blushing when speaking to attractive males. What would it be like, to fear nothing? To live life to it’s fullest? To look back and have regrets and accomplishments besides whether or not I failed a quiz? 

On one hand, the Stoners don’t have a plan, and they commit themselves to a limited future with their laziness. On the other hand, most of them learn to rely on themselves in life. Us nerds are comfortable, usually middle class, and the most we do without parental guidance are our volunteering activities. Another guy I know, Kale, is planning on attending trade school, has a girlfriend (ADORABLE couple, so hippie-like), doesn’t do jack at school, and is outspoken and admired. 

You tell me, who does it seem will succeed in the real world? Nerds may clutch their stellar academic reputation like a life jacket to keep from drowning, but stoners are practically doing the butterfly and backstroke. 

 

For their future career, I think the prize goes to:

And the winners at living life:

Who do you think is the real winner?

 

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