What’s YOUR Motivation to Get Out of Bed Every Morning?

Leave a comment with the answer. I’m honestly curious, because sometimes I just lit there and wonder, “What’s the point?”

Logically, I can answer that question a million times. To be with the people I love, to do things I love, etc.

But I wanna hear what motivates you to get out of bed every morning.

Besides your alarm.

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Late Night Coffee Musings #3

I’m leaving for college in the fall.

God, it doesn’t even sound real. I’m leaving for college. I am departing for ‘life after high school’. The bird is leaving the nest. How am I supposed to leave? I can’t even do my own fucking laundry, let alone take care of myself when I’m sick or lonely.

I wanna take the world by storm. I wanna find what I’m good at and be excellent. I have ambition.It’s not pointed in any specific direction at the moment, but it’s there, and it’s powerful. But is it worth missing my brother’s first year of high school? Of making sure my little sister still laughs at all our jokes and doesn’t say the word ‘totes’? Or my best friend, my sister who’s going to be filling her college applications and going through the rollercoaster I went through.

(As I’m writing this, my youngest sister is trying to replicate Joey from Friend’s “How YOU doing,” and failing spectacularly.)

Everyone asks themselves what the point is of waking up every morning. Why should we get up, why should we try? I love my parents, but I want to help answer those questions for my siblings when they come up. I want my Mom to tell me good morning cheerfully, even when I look like an angry raccoon with bedhead.

It’s not like I’m vanishing for the next 4 years. I’m going to come home as often as I can. But I’m also not stupid, and I know that once I move out, things are never gonna be quite the same. And I need to learn how to let go so I can build something new, something potentially better.

I’m so excited for college, but I’m so terrified of letting go.

And God, I’m so scared I’m going to mess up. I’ve never really felt true fear in my life. I’ve been scared, sure, when we couldn’t locate my brother or my little sister fell asleep under the bed for hours and we couldn’t find her. But I’ve never been bone-chillingly terrified. Terrified that I will go against everything I believe in, against everything I was raised to protect myself against. Terrified that I’ll be so swept up in the moment, I’ll forget that that ‘s all it is. A moment. Just a blink in time that could cast a shadow on the rest of my life. I’m young and impulsive and about to go to move out for college at a good school that’s also a party school. If I start down the wrong path, I don’t know if I’ll be strong enough to pull myself off it. And if by some miracle I am, I don’t even know who I’ll be.

But that’s why we get up in the morning, I guess. To fight through another day, through another make more moments and more memories. To fight, so that one day you wake up, look in the mirror, and know you’re strong enough. You can win the fight with yourself, the urge to let what you want be what you can’t live without, to lose sight of what’s important.

It’s so, so easy to make the wrong choice. And that’s what I’m afraid of.

That my wrong choice has already begun.

Late Night Coffee Thoughts

“I am so tired.”

It’s funny how ‘I’m tired’ is the slightly more honest version of ‘I’m fine.’

You can be tired from a long shift at work, or an argument with your best friend.

Or you can be tired from spending the night crying. You can be tired from pasting a smile on your face when all you can hear is the screaming in your head.

You can literally not move for hours and feel more tired than when you woke up.

I think it’s just our mind, fighting back the tidal waves of insecurity, of doubt, of regret. Pretty tough job, I must say. And it must really suck, going to sleep with the knowledge that when you wake up, you’ll be even more tired than when you closed your eyes.

But I’m Awkward Than That Princess Who Made Out With a Frog

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Ah, another random, yet telling title.
Hello, folksies. It’s been a while.
So, for anyone who cares, this is a little blip on the life of Miss Vera, and I thought I’d share it, since talking to people I know has been less successful than trying to communicate to my dog that my shoes were not edible.
Yesterday, I was just sitting in history, reading a book that is irritating me to no end (but I have no time for another trip to the library) and waiting for the class clowns in my class to quiet down. My teacher places a little white slip on my desk, and my heart stutters.
I’ve been called to the counselor’s office.
The period passes by agonizingly slow, until my teacher gives me leave to head to the counselor’s office. It was a windy day, and I was mentally reviewing anything bad I could’ve done that might have warranted a call slip. Nothing came to mind. My idea of rebellion is staying up till the wee hours of the morning every night.
So I knocked on the door and smiled at my counselor (lovely woman, not one of the Grinch-esque old women with dried drool practically caked into their wrinkles).
“Hi!” I said nervously.
“Hey,” she smiled, and motioned for me to take a seat.
I sat, careful not to knock over one of her frames.
“Did I do something bad?” I blurted.
She looked up, startled. “No! Something good, in fact. Here, let me just get you a copy…”
She handed me a paper, and began explaining before I had a chance to read it. “You’ve been nominated to be interviewed for the American Auxiliary League, or Girl’s State. Do you know what that is?”
I shook my head no.
“It’s a program where you and many other girls campaign and ‘govern’ as if you were in your own state. You’d stay in a dorm for a week-if you’re selected- and it’s a great thing to put on a college app.”
Hopefully, the huge “HUH” in my mind wasn’t stamped on my face. “So it’s like we’re the government? And I’d be living there?”
“Yup.”
“Uum…why was I nominated? Like, from everyone else? Who nominated me?”
She looks surprised. “Well, I did. And…you’re in AP Us history.”
Bear in mind, there are three APUSH classes. And I have a B. Personally, I think it’s cause I’m one of her favorite students, but I’m not sure.
-End of Dialogue
I headed to math after that (ugh), excited, wanting to screech. What an opportunity! An actual dorm! Government!
When I told my parents, my Dad’s excitement hit the roof. He went on about how could see me as Senator, popularity advice,etc etc. My excitement had dimmed a bit, and after I researched the program, was bordering on nausea. Hundreds of girls went, the brightest of the bright, and we had to campaign for positions. The interview wouldn’t be one on one, you’d be with the other girls vying to be delegates.
Shoot.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti-social. But if you’ve been following my posts, you’re aware that I’m reserved with people I don’t know. Sure, I can be charismatic, charming, flattering….but only for a certain time. I have a social limit.
Then I’m more awkward than that princess who made out with a frog.
If by some miracle I manage to bag the interview and am chosen as delegate, I CANNOT GO ON STAGE AND ENCOURAGE HUNDREDS OF STRANGE GIRLS TO VOTE FOR ME.
I’d end of a) puking b) fainting c) laughing hysterically before bursting into tears and crying for my mommy or d) all of the above.
What should I do, folks? My parent’s (Dad) are super excited, and on some level, so am I. But can I do it? Yoda would probably give me some advice like, “Never know till try, you will.” So if anyone actually bothered to read through all this, any realistic advice for a freaking out teen?

Peace, Love, & Coffee~~

Confessions of a Sarcastic Teen

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So I was thinking…wouldn’t it be a great idea to post stories and comments on certain subject from real live teenagers? Without having to worry if they’re lying through their teeth because you are an adult?

That’s where I come in. I can be a teenage spy. No trade secrets will be revealed, of course. I’m not Benedict Arnold. I will only share anonymous  stories from teens that will make you laugh, think, or tear up. 

Probably laugh though. 

Anyway, is this a good idea? Should I embark on this mission? This blog is, after all, called “The Teen Years”, and I can’t be the sole source. 

Whaddya think?

Respond to the Call of a Teen ASAP!

Hello my lovely bloggers! 

I have an urgent request. My friend is a singer-in-training, and she wants to do a round where she sings in front of our entire school, but we can’t seem to find a song that is easy, recognizable, but still impressive. She has a deep voice, and she’s really great at changing pitches. 

Any suggestions are welcome!